Tag Archives: self-esteem


Father said to re-post a word from 2013.  He said “I am doing a new thing in the earth.”  And this Word is what he’s talking about.  He’s teaching many to rule and reign.  It happens from our Seat.

The world is waiting for us to sit on that Seat each day and do our job.  It is what changes the world and brings heaven to earth.

*** Continue reading HE’S DOING A NEW THING


That was the label I heard from Father when I asked about his feelings on the subject of Halloween.  He said it with a wry grin and then my morning of learning began.

Within this period of learning how to administer the Earth as a Son (Daughter) of God,  I was struck this morning with the advent of Halloween and what my position should be.  I didn’t know.  Eek!

Father insinuated that it was an impending storm, but he did it with that knowing grin and asked me how I had learned to deal with storms.

So I dragged out everything I’ve learned about handling storms. Continue reading THE IMPENDING STORM OF HALLOWEEN

Weapon’s grade

Please don’t tell me you’re mad at God and can’t speak to Him because He let Great Aunt Suzy die and she didn’t deserve it.  You can’t keep up this attitude or you’re going to die wrapped up in the same ignorance that let Aunt Suzy die.

God was talking to you from the moment you were conceived but you got too big for your britches and began ignoring Him.  He wanted to teach you how to win the temptations and trials you were going to face.  He wanted to show you how to whip some ugly butt.  He knows all the secrets of the universe.  He created it.  And He created you to learn the secrets – if you want to.  But He’ll never force you to spend time with Him, or listen to Him. Continue reading Weapon’s grade


in the mirror


Father asked me to see love in the mirror.  And not only that but to love her the way that He does.

Oh, how I wanted to run away from this mirror and drink enough wine to vanquish the thought because I didn’t want to accept this woman as myself.  I didn’t want to love her as me.

I cringed, and I’m sorry that I did, but I did.  She is not the woman I still see in my head.  And she’s someone I never thought I’d ever become. I don’t know how she got here and why she took over my body!  And I’ve been so angry about it, and so discouraged.

So, I tried to beat her into submission and make her return to the woman she once was.  I tried.  I swear I really tried.  But she wouldn’t submit.  She just grew larger and older.  Continue reading LOVE IN THE MIRROR!







There might be a simple explanation for why the 5 wise virgins wouldn’t share the oil.  Let me explain what I mean.

When Jesus talked to the woman at the well about a personal relationship with God, He said,  “Regardless of whether you are in Jerusalem or on this mountain, if you do not seek the Father, then you do not worship.” That was in John 4.

He talked about it being personal but He didn’t try to talk anyone into it.  He didn’t find people on the street to ask if they know God so He could explain it to them.  And I don’t recall that He pursued people at all. Continue reading SORRY, THE OIL ISN’T FOR SHARING!


beautiful person


Thank you, Father, for this beautiful person You made me be.

What? No!  I’m sorry.   Father, forgive me but that isn’t what I see today. Today I want to know what’s wrong with me? Because honestly, there seems to be so much! And I can’t figure it out.

I know Your silence means this is the wrong question.  It’s not a topic that’s inside Your Heart.  You don’t have a section called “What’s wrong with me.”  And that’s because Your Heart only sees what’s right with me.  But I just don’t get that right now. You don’t comprehend being disappointed in me.   But I’m horribly disappointed with me.

You see only a beautiful grace, a smart wit, my complex uniqueness, that joyful spark and the tender heart – all the things I can barely write about myself at this moment.

You’ve shown me my robe, my crown, my sword, my scepter, and many, many gifts You’ve given me.  Their revelations have lifted my Identity higher. But here I am still sitting in the gutter as a worthless worm.

And I still ask what’s wrong with me? In earnest I ask, believing something mysterious, something hidden, something beyond my grasping – is deeply wrong with me.  I’m not quite right.  I don’t fit in.  I don’t follow appropriately.  Why am I so different and isolated?  Yes, I know I’m part of a set apart and peculiar people but I see myself much more peculiar than anyone.

My metamorphosis into Your Bride has been a process.  I see You doing the same to many of Your Children all around the world.  You teach us patiently. Change us internally. You show us the perfection of You that lives within us. And You want us to accept that perfection as our own. To believe that we are as You are, one.

I’ve seen how our sovereign words make a mark on the Earth, even when they are a question.  An immature question.

The answer will manifest as a result of our speaking it out.  Those words spoken into the realms move creation.  They become true.

My words took me to an ER on a beautiful weekend with severe chest pain whose source was never found, because I keep saying there is something wrong with me.  No one can find the answer to that question.  No one will locate its meaning because its source is not You.  Those words are simply my lack of fullness as I learn who I am in You.

Yes, I reaped the reward of my words.  I suffered some consequences of my immaturity.  But it was a temporary consequence. You even paid the bill in full (literally). And in the end, I have begun to see the Light.

So today I surrender. And I ask humbly that you take this immature piece of me and flood it with Your Truth. Wash it and fill it that I will never again ask what’s wrong with me.

But I will say, thank you, Father, for this beautiful person You have created in me.

The Scary Building



Years ago, I got a new job that required I walk through a scary building twice a day.  It was a security check. And it was part of my job.

Light bulbs had burned out in most of the building, so it was pitch black in the hallways.  I submitted an order for them to be changed but that took a few days.  In the meantime, I had to go through the building.

Friends said I should skip it until the lights were fixed.  But I was compelled to do my job correctly.  I didn’t want fear to victimize me.  So, I searched for comfort and protection through memorizing scripture.

I chose: “God has not given me a spirit of fear, but of power, love and a strong mind” 2 Timothy 1:7. Continue reading The Scary Building