Back in the day, when Hunny and I were more immature, we’d have some rip-roaring episodes now and then. Father never condemned me for any one of them and as I look back now, I can see His hand in each one. They were how we learned to live with each other, give each other wide berth to be ourselves, and respect the strength we inherently possessed individually.
Honestly, neither of us thought our marriage would survive very long. We were both so strong-willed and assertive. The match was definitely equal.
But we did learn. Sometimes unwillingly.
And we didn’t always go to bed in forgiveness. However, we often woke up that way.
It used to surprise me when I’d turn around and suddenly love him dearly when only moments ago anger had been spilling over. I remember the first time it happened, I resisted. After all, I was mad at him, wasn’t I? Shouldn’t I still be? He hadn’t apologized. And he had hurt my feelings. I’d even cried my heart out.
But my Spirit would insist that I should simply let it go, and let love and laughter fill the space between us again. It was weird. We hadn’t settled anything. Shouldn’t we sit down and talk about this at length? Shouldn’t we hash out the boundaries?
Nope. Apparently, we shouldn’t. According to the Spirit inside me, we should leave what lies behind and step into the Joy and Love that is freely available. It felt unfinished like leaving dirty dishes in the sink. But it also felt like release and like lightness shining.
I learned to let go. I learned to laugh and hug and kiss without knowing the answers to the questions. And I learned to relax. No one had to be in control when Love was around. Mostly, I learned to let Father worry about it. He’s a lot smarter than me anyway.
I know this isn’t traditional Christian teaching. But this is what we came to know as the resolution to all things. Let it go. Let it be. We weren’t wise enough to fix the inner workings of our personalities and characters. Only Holy Spirit knows what lays at the bottom and how to mold it. So, we let Him do what He does best.
And if the situation required a forthcoming decision, then we were a bit more respectful of each other in the following discussion.
I wanted to share this with you because, just maybe, your relationships aren’t traditional either. And just maybe you need to hear that it’s OK. Maybe you too have discovered unconventional means of resolution and healing. And maybe it is the good thing to do. The peaceful, loving, and restoring thing.
When Father’s Spirit lives inside us, He is more than capable. He can do so much more than we have learned. And we truly can lean on Him for resolution and love. He is overflowing with it and gives it freely.
Hunny and I don’t live with old resentments or wounds and we have never given much time to apologies. But if you ask either of us what has kept us through the years, we’d probably answer “Letting go and laughing”. It’s miraculous.
Thank you for joining me on this journey. I send blessings to accompany you on yours.