Did you have the frustrations of being a child with an older sibling?
The first time my older brother went on a date, I was about 5 years old. And I wanted to go too. After all, he was going to a movie with a friend and he was staying up past bedtime. There was no fair reason that I couldn’t go with him.
And I remember the little grin on his face as I got madder and madder.
I wasn’t wrong about bedtime. It was a rule. So, why was it OK with Mom and Dad that my brother break the rules? And if it was OK for him to break the rules then it should be OK for me to break them too!
Plus, he was always going somewhere alone. No one had to go with him. He could go by himself. But I couldn’t. I had rules he didn’t have. And it wasn’t fair. How could Mom and Dad support this double standard?
The same sort of frustration happened when I began trying to explain my spiritual evolution to my Christian siblings. They got mad, said I was breaking all the rules, and I was going to get in big trouble if I didn’t stop it and get back on the sidewalk with everyone else.
But, I don’t follow the rules they follow. Not anymore. And I walk away from those rules feeling no remorse or guilt. So, they usually they call me a heretic and unfriend me.
I’m not sure if they are noticing, but Father isn’t angry about it. He even seems to be sharing a different kind of experience with me!
A while back when some of my Christian siblings were berating me and then rejecting me, I didn’t understand their reaction, so Father gave me this analogy from my childhood. It helped me understand them a bit better.
They couldn’t understand my freedom or why I was breaking the rules.
I wanted to tell them, “Just do it like this and then you can experience this too”.
Wasn’t that what we did? Didn’t we share our revelations and experiences so that everyone else could enjoy the same thing? Isn’t that what unity is all about? Keeping everyone on the same page?
Apparently that isn’t one of God’s rules. It’s purely a concept we made up ourselves because it doesn’t happen like that.
When Jesus shared revelations with His disciples, He didn’t do it with the masses.
Those masses had fears and insecurities that kept them from being free. And they weren’t ready to join the 120 believers in the upper room. Just like my friends weren’t ready to join me on my journey.
No one ever taught us that growth and revelation could separate us from our masses (groups). We were only told that everyone went down the exact same path. And anyone who’s path looked different, was doing it wrong.
But that’s not what Jesus did.
Jesus purposely told parables so the masses wouldn’t completely understand what He was talking about. Then He shared the inside scoop later, alone, with the disciples.
Why did he do that? Because He knew everyone is at different levels of maturity and character. It’s a simple fact of life in the Kingdom and outside it.
Now my siblings are mad at me and think I’m arrogant, mean, and rebelliously stomping all over the rules.
But just because they think those things, doesn’t mean they’re true.
Another analogy Father gave me was from my first marriage.
Wally and I married when I was 17 years old and we stayed together 17 years. But no matter how we tried to compromise, our characters didn’t mesh.
He was a satisfied person with no goals for more. He wanted a good job and a roof over his head. And that’s exactly what he got with the career he learned from his Dad. He went to work for a shop where he stayed until retirement. And he got an apartment and stayed for 30 years.
There’s nothing wrong with that.
However, I was a curious person, constantly moving, learning, and wanting more. I had so many goals and dreams that I couldn’t choose which one to do first.
So, Wally and I didn’t have a common basic ground. While I was being curious, he was asking me to be satisfied. So, I tried his way and I think he tried mine. It worked about as well as oil and water.
Some people grow old living in the same town, doing the same thing, believing the same beliefs, and going to the same church. I marvel at them.
But I couldn’t do it.
It doesn’t matter if it’s by choice or design. We are all different, unique, and walking through life differently. Plus we do it at different paces. And that is simply a whole lot of difference.
God made us that way on purpose. That way we couldn’t define a specific blueprint that would work exactly the same way for each one of us. If we could, then we would have finished the tower of Babel.
And that’s how it works!
None of us do it exactly the same way or within the same blueprint. The ONLY constant in all these variables is Jesus. He is with each one of us on our variable paths, and He’ll never leave us or forsake us.
Blessings on your journey. I hope you find peace when your siblings don’t.
Faith